Lost is over and everyone hates the ending apparently. Just like everyone hated the Sopranos ending and the Seinfeld ending. Let's be honest, nothing was gonna make people happy. What eneding could have possibly made it good enough for everyone. I was hoping for the reveal the whole show was an acid trip by George Jefferson.
TOP 10: Freddy Kruegar Movies
9. Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare: Just awful. Freddy is killed by his daughter... What daughter you ask? Exactly.
8 Nightmare on Elm Street 2: A crappy follow up to the classic original. Feels like someone wrote this script over the weekend. It's probably a little higher on most lists, but it really rubbed me the wrong way.
7. Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The series had basically petered out by now. Lots of set up to dumb deaths. Robert Englund tries to save it.
6. Nightmare on Elm Street (2010): It was okay. Jackie Earle Haley was okay. Everything was okay. Not a remake that needed doing.
5. Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Had some decent spillover from part 3. Decent storyline but you can see things are starting to go off track.
4. Freddy vs. Jason: Just good goofy fun. Freddy is portrayed as a psychotic killer and Jason somehow becomes the victim. A good watch.
3. New Nightmare: A strange twist on the story. Great to see all the cast members from the original back in their roles and playing themselves.
2. Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors: A trememdous entry into the series. Kids in this story can control their dreams and are (almost) a match for Freddy and can fight him on his own ground.
1. Nightmare on Elm Street (1984): Classic. Englund is scary as hell and the casting is fantastic. The bedroom bloodbath is a real highlight. Saxon is great as the father and cop who knows more than he's letting on.
Currently Watching: Glee
Currently Reading: The Tommyknockers
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Oh, the Horror
So in lieu of a stirring opening to this week's blog, I'm going to link to a story I wrote. It's a 5 page script and it involves horror movie cliches.
http://www.moviepoet.com/pdf.aspx?scriptid=1088
TOP TEN: MUPPETS--- No sesame street muppets eligible
10. Sam the Eagle: Never quite got what was going on, and often had hilariously stupid speeches.
9. Rowlf: Good for a good quip now and again. Was overshadowed by the more loud mouth muppets.
8. Gonzo: Not as funny as some people think, but watching a strange looking muppet having a creepy relationship with a chicken is a good time.
7. Animal: If you don't know why animal is funny, kill yourself. This is probably lower than Animal is on most lists.
6. Swedish Chef: Ah Borka Borka Borka. Who cares if you can't tell what the hell he's saying, it's still hilarious.
5. Miss Piggy: A psychotic woman who smells like bacon. She is the perfect foil for Kermit and is very popular in her own right. Plus she was a Pig in Space
4. Beeker: Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep. The eternally suffering assistant of Dr. Bunson Honeydew of Muppet Labs. You can pretty much bank that he will blow up at some point.
3. Rizzo the Rat: A wiseass rat. What else is there to say.
2. Statler and Waldorf: The guys in the balcony, and yes they count as one. They sit in a balcony and insult the muppets, in particular Fozzie, and basically rip on everyone. So yes, they are my heroes.
1. Kermit the Frog: Well, no kidding huh. Famous the world over and instantly recognizable as an American Icon.
Where is Fozzie you ask? Well I hate Fozzie and I don't think he's funny. I would have put Scooter, Lew Zealand, Dr. Teeth and the rest of the band ahead of that bucket of poop.
Currently Watching: Zombieland
Currently Reading: The Shining by Stephen King
http://www.moviepoet.com/pdf.aspx?scriptid=1088
TOP TEN: MUPPETS--- No sesame street muppets eligible
10. Sam the Eagle: Never quite got what was going on, and often had hilariously stupid speeches.
9. Rowlf: Good for a good quip now and again. Was overshadowed by the more loud mouth muppets.
8. Gonzo: Not as funny as some people think, but watching a strange looking muppet having a creepy relationship with a chicken is a good time.
7. Animal: If you don't know why animal is funny, kill yourself. This is probably lower than Animal is on most lists.
6. Swedish Chef: Ah Borka Borka Borka. Who cares if you can't tell what the hell he's saying, it's still hilarious.
5. Miss Piggy: A psychotic woman who smells like bacon. She is the perfect foil for Kermit and is very popular in her own right. Plus she was a Pig in Space
4. Beeker: Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep. The eternally suffering assistant of Dr. Bunson Honeydew of Muppet Labs. You can pretty much bank that he will blow up at some point.
3. Rizzo the Rat: A wiseass rat. What else is there to say.
2. Statler and Waldorf: The guys in the balcony, and yes they count as one. They sit in a balcony and insult the muppets, in particular Fozzie, and basically rip on everyone. So yes, they are my heroes.
1. Kermit the Frog: Well, no kidding huh. Famous the world over and instantly recognizable as an American Icon.
Where is Fozzie you ask? Well I hate Fozzie and I don't think he's funny. I would have put Scooter, Lew Zealand, Dr. Teeth and the rest of the band ahead of that bucket of poop.
Currently Watching: Zombieland
Currently Reading: The Shining by Stephen King
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Dino-Bots
Movie Review: PLANET OF THE DINOSAURS (1978)
I remembered this gem from when I was a young lad. I had great memories of dinosaurs eating people and generally menacing survivors of a spaceship crash.
So. The plot is this: A spaceship crash lands on a planet filled with stop motion dinosaurs. Mayhem ensues.
That doesn't do this classic movie justice thought. First of all the uniforms and facial hair deserve their own dedicated section. The uniforms look like a cross between a bad 1950's sci-fi show and The Running Man. Their are porno mustaches all around. The only exceptions are one guy who's clean shaven, and who has his shirt off the whole movie for no real reason. The other guy has a full beard, and that's how we know he's the man's man.
After the crash, which is never explained, they promptly forget their homing beacon. As you would when you crash land. So naturally the buffest guy deshirts followed by the hottest dumbest female. This is when the killing begins. Mostly offscreen of course since the budget was about 11 dollars.
I highly reccomend finding this movie on the strength of the acting; it's horrifying. The wonderful plot; they don't bother with one. The special effects;1978 and bad for the era. The tremendous dialogue... Some examples.
NYLA: I don't think a chicken laid these eggs...
HARVEY: Well, it wasn't a streetcar baby
----------------
MIKE: Are you afraid of me?
DERNA LEE: Should I be.
MIKE: I'm just another guy.
DERNA LEE: But what if I'm the last one.
You can watch it on YouTube for free.
10. Battle at the Alamo: This is the least important battle on the list, but it may be the most well known. It was signifigant in the development of the United States by leading the defeat of Mexico and the incorporation of much of the southwest. Plus there is the awesome headwear.
9. Siege of Yorktown: The final battle of the Revolutionary War. The British forces are finally forced to surrender after being pinned in by American ground forces and the French Navy. This was the battle that finally cut the cord to the British Empire and really began the United States.
8. Battle of the Argonne Forest: What, you never heard of it huh. This one of the bloodiest battles in American history, but it was in WWI so it's mostly forgotten over here. This battle began to break the German resistance and led to the Armistice that ended the war.
7. Battle of Antietam: The bloodiest day in American history (23,000 casualites). The Union was able to repel Robert E. Lee's first northern invasion, but it was not a conclusive vicotory. However, President Lincoln was able to issue the Emancipation Proclamation on the back of the vicotory.
6. Tet Offensive: The Viet Cong launched an offensive in 1968 against the comand and control of South Vietnam and the US. Although the US and South Vietnam end up winning the battle the offensive swings most support to North Vietnam. Although the war lasts for many more years this is when Vietnam was lost in most regards.
5. Battle of Iwo Jima: Some of the fiercest deadliest fighting of WWII. The entrenched Japanese were almost totally annihilate either by fighting or ritual suicide. The airbases were to be used for either an invasion of Japan or as a base for B-29's carrying the Atomic bomb. And if you haven't seen the flag raising on Mt. Suribachi you are in fact blind.
4. Battle of Gettysburg: The turning point of the Civil War. After this Union victory the south never seriously threatened the North and mostly fought a defensive battle until their surrender. Also the site of the Gettysburg Address and countless reenactments.
3. Attack on Pearl Harbor: The surprise Japanese attack brought the United States into WWII. Most of the Pacific Fleet was either sunk or damaged with the exceptions of the aircraft carriers. It was an American defeat, but lead to eventual Japanese defeat.
2. Battle of Saratoga: The second battle of two battles was a decisive American victory and lead to the surrender of over 6000 British troops. It signaled the Americans were capable of fighting and beating the British in head to head combat.
I remembered this gem from when I was a young lad. I had great memories of dinosaurs eating people and generally menacing survivors of a spaceship crash.
So. The plot is this: A spaceship crash lands on a planet filled with stop motion dinosaurs. Mayhem ensues.
That doesn't do this classic movie justice thought. First of all the uniforms and facial hair deserve their own dedicated section. The uniforms look like a cross between a bad 1950's sci-fi show and The Running Man. Their are porno mustaches all around. The only exceptions are one guy who's clean shaven, and who has his shirt off the whole movie for no real reason. The other guy has a full beard, and that's how we know he's the man's man.
After the crash, which is never explained, they promptly forget their homing beacon. As you would when you crash land. So naturally the buffest guy deshirts followed by the hottest dumbest female. This is when the killing begins. Mostly offscreen of course since the budget was about 11 dollars.
I highly reccomend finding this movie on the strength of the acting; it's horrifying. The wonderful plot; they don't bother with one. The special effects;1978 and bad for the era. The tremendous dialogue... Some examples.
NYLA: I don't think a chicken laid these eggs...
HARVEY: Well, it wasn't a streetcar baby
----------------
MIKE: Are you afraid of me?
DERNA LEE: Should I be.
MIKE: I'm just another guy.
DERNA LEE: But what if I'm the last one.
You can watch it on YouTube for free.
10. Battle at the Alamo: This is the least important battle on the list, but it may be the most well known. It was signifigant in the development of the United States by leading the defeat of Mexico and the incorporation of much of the southwest. Plus there is the awesome headwear.
9. Siege of Yorktown: The final battle of the Revolutionary War. The British forces are finally forced to surrender after being pinned in by American ground forces and the French Navy. This was the battle that finally cut the cord to the British Empire and really began the United States.
8. Battle of the Argonne Forest: What, you never heard of it huh. This one of the bloodiest battles in American history, but it was in WWI so it's mostly forgotten over here. This battle began to break the German resistance and led to the Armistice that ended the war.
7. Battle of Antietam: The bloodiest day in American history (23,000 casualites). The Union was able to repel Robert E. Lee's first northern invasion, but it was not a conclusive vicotory. However, President Lincoln was able to issue the Emancipation Proclamation on the back of the vicotory.
6. Tet Offensive: The Viet Cong launched an offensive in 1968 against the comand and control of South Vietnam and the US. Although the US and South Vietnam end up winning the battle the offensive swings most support to North Vietnam. Although the war lasts for many more years this is when Vietnam was lost in most regards.
5. Battle of Iwo Jima: Some of the fiercest deadliest fighting of WWII. The entrenched Japanese were almost totally annihilate either by fighting or ritual suicide. The airbases were to be used for either an invasion of Japan or as a base for B-29's carrying the Atomic bomb. And if you haven't seen the flag raising on Mt. Suribachi you are in fact blind.
4. Battle of Gettysburg: The turning point of the Civil War. After this Union victory the south never seriously threatened the North and mostly fought a defensive battle until their surrender. Also the site of the Gettysburg Address and countless reenactments.
3. Attack on Pearl Harbor: The surprise Japanese attack brought the United States into WWII. Most of the Pacific Fleet was either sunk or damaged with the exceptions of the aircraft carriers. It was an American defeat, but lead to eventual Japanese defeat.
2. Battle of Saratoga: The second battle of two battles was a decisive American victory and lead to the surrender of over 6000 British troops. It signaled the Americans were capable of fighting and beating the British in head to head combat.
1. Invation of Normandy: Operation Overlord- The Allied attack on fortress Europe in 1944 was the first major step in defeating the Nazi's. The weather was lousy and most of the armor was late or sank, but the infantry and paratroopers were able to secure the vital foothold they needed. Just watch the beginning of Saving Private Ryan.
Currently Watching: Caprica
Currently Reading: Dragon's Egg by Robert Forward
Until next time.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Mt. Eyj... something something
So, if a volcano erupts in Europe and no one can fly home, does an American make a dumb statement? Well, the answer is yes. I managed to catch a few minutes of Mt. longIcelandicname erupting and covering European airspace with LA like smoke and ash. There was the interviews with stranded travelers and all of them basically had the same quote in different accents. "Yea, I don't like being stuck, but what can you do."
But then, my news channel was able to find the one jackass American who was going to make us look like whiny babies. Here is this genius's response paraphrased. "Well it's a hell of an inconvenience and I'll be happy when these people get it cleared up." These people? Do you think this is the first step in Iceland's big move to dominate manking... or all those European pigs in on this together. Although I'm sure this bozo is far more important than other travelers whose flights were cancelled, like Air Force One, we can only hope his return flight gets lost in the Bermuda triangle.
No story this week, as I can't be bothered to find or write one.
TOP TEN: Best Presidents
I stopped at 1980. Didn't want to judge anyone too quickly so Carter was the last president considered.
10. John Kennedy- 35 president: close call on this one. Navigated the Cuban missile crisis. Made some great speeches. We wonder how far he could have climbed... or fallen on this last.
9. James Polk- 11 president: Who, you ask. Manifest Destiny. Expanded the country from ocean to ocean. Won war against Mexico.
8. Harry Truman- 33 president: Truman Doctrine. Used atomic weapons to end WWII.
7. Dwight Eisenhower- 34 president: Began desegregation of the south and the armed forces. Created the interstate highway system.
6. Woodrow Wilson- 28 president: Created the Federal Reserve. Forced America out of isolation into World War I. First try at world cooperation with League of Nations.
5. Theodore Roosevelt- 26 president: Stopped corrupt and rapidly expanding industry. Established many national parks. Walked softly and carried a big stick.
4. Thomas Jefferson- 3 president: Doubled the size of the country. Consolidated power of the federal government. It doesn't sound sexy I know.
3. George Washington-1 president: Would be higher if this included his pre-presidency accomplishments. However, his two most important items were the first and the last. First, not accepting a kingship or anything like that. Last, walking away from the job after 8 years.
2. Franklin Roosevelt-32 president: Great Depression, check. World War II, check. No use of legs, check. Why isn't he one, well he did have four terms to get all these things done.
But then, my news channel was able to find the one jackass American who was going to make us look like whiny babies. Here is this genius's response paraphrased. "Well it's a hell of an inconvenience and I'll be happy when these people get it cleared up." These people? Do you think this is the first step in Iceland's big move to dominate manking... or all those European pigs in on this together. Although I'm sure this bozo is far more important than other travelers whose flights were cancelled, like Air Force One, we can only hope his return flight gets lost in the Bermuda triangle.
No story this week, as I can't be bothered to find or write one.
TOP TEN: Best Presidents
I stopped at 1980. Didn't want to judge anyone too quickly so Carter was the last president considered.
10. John Kennedy- 35 president: close call on this one. Navigated the Cuban missile crisis. Made some great speeches. We wonder how far he could have climbed... or fallen on this last.
9. James Polk- 11 president: Who, you ask. Manifest Destiny. Expanded the country from ocean to ocean. Won war against Mexico.
8. Harry Truman- 33 president: Truman Doctrine. Used atomic weapons to end WWII.
7. Dwight Eisenhower- 34 president: Began desegregation of the south and the armed forces. Created the interstate highway system.
6. Woodrow Wilson- 28 president: Created the Federal Reserve. Forced America out of isolation into World War I. First try at world cooperation with League of Nations.
5. Theodore Roosevelt- 26 president: Stopped corrupt and rapidly expanding industry. Established many national parks. Walked softly and carried a big stick.
4. Thomas Jefferson- 3 president: Doubled the size of the country. Consolidated power of the federal government. It doesn't sound sexy I know.
3. George Washington-1 president: Would be higher if this included his pre-presidency accomplishments. However, his two most important items were the first and the last. First, not accepting a kingship or anything like that. Last, walking away from the job after 8 years.
2. Franklin Roosevelt-32 president: Great Depression, check. World War II, check. No use of legs, check. Why isn't he one, well he did have four terms to get all these things done.
1. Abraham Lincoln-16th president: Let's see, he kept the country together and won the Civil War, and Emancipated the slaves. Not bad. Also he wasn't going to punish the south for the war.
Done.
Currently Reading: The Long Walk by Richard Bachman
Currently Watching: Mad Men Season 3
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Tub Story
Here's a quick link to a story I wrote. It's based on actual events.
http://www.spillbook.com/59/cold-tub/
TOP TEN: And it's actually ten.
Top ten crap sequels. I stuck to only the second movie of each group. So Jaws 4 is safe.... for now.
10 Weekend at Bernies 2
Who the hell greenlit this crap. I can only assume there was a bet riding on this.
Cringeworthy: He's been dead a really.... long.... time...
9. Speed 2
Here's something you don't want to hear "This film was really missing Keanu Reeves" It sounds like a MAD magazine parody instead of a real movie
Cringeworthy: Jason Patric as a leading man
8. Dumb and Dumberer
Hey, let's replace Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels with Derek Richardson and Eric Christian Olson... Again, instead of firing this person, they made the movie.
Cringeworthy: They show a backstory on Harry's chipped tooth...
7. Revenge of the Nerds 2
While the first one wasn't The Godfather, it's amazing how far this falls short. Anthony Edwards bails almost completely and therefore had a career for a while.
Cringeworthy: Ogre goes good
6. Oceans 12
The ultimate phone in. Everyone had such a good time hanging out, they forgot to make a conherent movie. It's a worse failure than the previous films because it's loaded with talent.
Cringeworthy: Julia Roberts pretends to be... Julia Roberts.
5. The Matrix Reloaded
Ah, the good days before we knew the Wachowski's would never make another good film. This film blows. It has a few good good action scenes, but they don't rescue how ridiculous this film looks compared to the first one.
Cringeworthy: The Rave scene. Ewww.
4. Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
A slightly different twist because the first one was crap. So, we all assumed that Lucas had kind of taken a little practice swing and was saving it up. Well, if he is, we're all still waiting. Again, I think we learned the truth, Lucas can't be in charge of anything... besides merchandising.
Cringeworthy: The love story...
3. Highlander 2: The Quickening
There can be only one... apparently not. We somehow throw out everything that happened at the end of the first one and... oh the hell with it, at least Sir Sean Connery got another paycheck.
Cringeworthy: Didn't Sean Connery get beheaded...
2. Blues Brothers 2000
Dan Akroyd pissing on John Belushi would have been a better title. John Goodman, love you, but you are not a Blues Brother. It takes a special kind of magic to accept two fat whiteboys as Blues artists and guess what, it ain't in this hellhole of a movie.
Cringeworthy: A lot of unBlues people singing and dancing
1. Caddyshack 2
Subtract Ted Knight, Rodney Dangerfield and Bill Murray; then add Jackie Mason and what do you get? Well, a big pile of shit of course. Jackie Mason again proves why he is horrible and why Sinatra should have put him out of his misery. Akroyd is weak and Chevy Chase is cashing a large paycheck. Everyone seems to know what crap they are in and can't wait for it to end... None of us can.
Cringeworthy: Jackie f'n Mason
Currently watching: Mad Men season 3
Currently listening: The Definitve Word podcast
Later.
http://www.spillbook.com/59/cold-tub/
TOP TEN: And it's actually ten.
Top ten crap sequels. I stuck to only the second movie of each group. So Jaws 4 is safe.... for now.
10 Weekend at Bernies 2
Who the hell greenlit this crap. I can only assume there was a bet riding on this.
Cringeworthy: He's been dead a really.... long.... time...
9. Speed 2
Here's something you don't want to hear "This film was really missing Keanu Reeves" It sounds like a MAD magazine parody instead of a real movie
Cringeworthy: Jason Patric as a leading man
8. Dumb and Dumberer
Hey, let's replace Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels with Derek Richardson and Eric Christian Olson... Again, instead of firing this person, they made the movie.
Cringeworthy: They show a backstory on Harry's chipped tooth...
7. Revenge of the Nerds 2
While the first one wasn't The Godfather, it's amazing how far this falls short. Anthony Edwards bails almost completely and therefore had a career for a while.
Cringeworthy: Ogre goes good
6. Oceans 12
The ultimate phone in. Everyone had such a good time hanging out, they forgot to make a conherent movie. It's a worse failure than the previous films because it's loaded with talent.
Cringeworthy: Julia Roberts pretends to be... Julia Roberts.
5. The Matrix Reloaded
Ah, the good days before we knew the Wachowski's would never make another good film. This film blows. It has a few good good action scenes, but they don't rescue how ridiculous this film looks compared to the first one.
Cringeworthy: The Rave scene. Ewww.
4. Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
A slightly different twist because the first one was crap. So, we all assumed that Lucas had kind of taken a little practice swing and was saving it up. Well, if he is, we're all still waiting. Again, I think we learned the truth, Lucas can't be in charge of anything... besides merchandising.
Cringeworthy: The love story...
3. Highlander 2: The Quickening
There can be only one... apparently not. We somehow throw out everything that happened at the end of the first one and... oh the hell with it, at least Sir Sean Connery got another paycheck.
Cringeworthy: Didn't Sean Connery get beheaded...
2. Blues Brothers 2000
Dan Akroyd pissing on John Belushi would have been a better title. John Goodman, love you, but you are not a Blues Brother. It takes a special kind of magic to accept two fat whiteboys as Blues artists and guess what, it ain't in this hellhole of a movie.
Cringeworthy: A lot of unBlues people singing and dancing
1. Caddyshack 2
Subtract Ted Knight, Rodney Dangerfield and Bill Murray; then add Jackie Mason and what do you get? Well, a big pile of shit of course. Jackie Mason again proves why he is horrible and why Sinatra should have put him out of his misery. Akroyd is weak and Chevy Chase is cashing a large paycheck. Everyone seems to know what crap they are in and can't wait for it to end... None of us can.
Cringeworthy: Jackie f'n Mason
Currently watching: Mad Men season 3
Currently listening: The Definitve Word podcast
Later.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
The Eagles lay an Egg
Merry Easter. After a weekend of searching for eggs it appears the Philadelphia Eagles have found a home for Donovan Mcnabb. As everyone knows Donovan is now a Washington Redskin. I won't elaborate further because I'm sure we'll all burned out already. And what does it matter I have him and Kolb on my fantasy team anyway.
MOVIE REVIEW: Law Abiding Citizen- I had been warned off this movie by a couple of facebook pseudofriends, but since the Netflix gods chose it for me we gave it a shot. It was actually a decent movie. It was filmed in Philadelphia, so that was a plus. I know, stop the presses, a movie about a murderer in Philly... How do they come up with these ideas? It kind of gets out of control toward the end, but I would give it a solid 7 stars out of 11.
TOP 10: Rocky Movies... well it's a top six I guess huh. Get used to this.
6: Rocky V: Where do I begin? Let's pretend like I could ignore that your son can't act Sly, what was everyone elses excuse for phoning this one in. Tommy shows all the acting chops you could expect from a big dopey white boxer. The climactic fight is interesting in it's total implausability. So, a local Philly hero is being beaten in the street, and everybody just stands there.... Right.
Best moment- after Paulie is punched, before the fight outside
Worst moment- during the fight, look for when the film is repeated and sped up for no reason
Quotable- "You knocked him down, why don't you try knocking me down now"
5: Rocky III: Okay, nothing rivals five for shit, but Mr. T. while a good laugh, is not the greatest antagonist. The story feels all wrong, very LA, very unRocky for the majority of the film. It's a very sequel movie. If that makes sense to you.
Best moment- Mickey's death scene. Aloha Burgess.
Worst moment- training montage. 80's heavy baby.
Quotable- "Eye of the Tiger, Rock"
4: Rocky IV: Great start to this one. Apollo shows us just how unstoppable the Russian is and... hey is that James Brown! So, after a lot of posturing we get to Moscow and we fight the guy who is three times Rocky's size. Not surprisingly, Rocky wins the day and defeats communism by himself. An average, but watchable movie.
Best moment- Training Montage, what an improvement
Worst moment- Rocky's speech about world peace. Please don't pontificate Rock.
Quotable- "If he dies, he dies"
3: Rocky Balboa: It doesn't matter if he's sixty, does it. Apparently a good script can overcome that minor problem of Rocky being nearlly eligible for social security. The movie shows that Stallone can actually act in more than grunts and the fight at the end has a lot of emotion to it. Unlike the previous three movies, you actually care what happens at the end.
Best moment- Rocky takes a final bow to the crowd
Worst moment- Rocky's opponents acting... seems like I've said that before.
Quotable- It ain't about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
2: Rocky II: The rematch. One of the best sequels ever made I'd say. For one thing, it's actually plausible that a champion would be so pissed he couldn't knock out some nobody he'd demand a rematch. "I won, but I didn't beat him." Creed says. There is a very good narrative outside the fight about Rocky, Adrian, their baby and Mickey. Everything fits together well and you are on the edge of your seat when Rocky heads to the arena. The final fight is epic, it feels like you watch an entire boxing match in about twenty minutes. Is the ending over the top... maybe, but you know you loved it.
Best moment- I'm gonna say it. Waiting to see who's going to get off the mat.
Worst moment- For some reason I dislike the opening hospital scene. I don't know why.
Quotable- "Win." "What are we waiting for!"
1: Rocky: Lots of suspense for that, huh. Rocky isn't a great boxing movie or a great sports movie. It's just a great movie. I won't use this space to break down the reasons why this is the probably the best sports movie ever. You should know that already. Needless to say, it's a movie were the protaganist wins even when he doesn't win.
Best moment- Running up the art museum steps the second time
Worst moment-N/A
quotable- "Adrian, Adrian"
Currently Watching: Battlestar Galactica Season 4
Currently Reading: I, Robot
Until next time.
MOVIE REVIEW: Law Abiding Citizen- I had been warned off this movie by a couple of facebook pseudofriends, but since the Netflix gods chose it for me we gave it a shot. It was actually a decent movie. It was filmed in Philadelphia, so that was a plus. I know, stop the presses, a movie about a murderer in Philly... How do they come up with these ideas? It kind of gets out of control toward the end, but I would give it a solid 7 stars out of 11.
TOP 10: Rocky Movies... well it's a top six I guess huh. Get used to this.
6: Rocky V: Where do I begin? Let's pretend like I could ignore that your son can't act Sly, what was everyone elses excuse for phoning this one in. Tommy shows all the acting chops you could expect from a big dopey white boxer. The climactic fight is interesting in it's total implausability. So, a local Philly hero is being beaten in the street, and everybody just stands there.... Right.
Best moment- after Paulie is punched, before the fight outside
Worst moment- during the fight, look for when the film is repeated and sped up for no reason
Quotable- "You knocked him down, why don't you try knocking me down now"
5: Rocky III: Okay, nothing rivals five for shit, but Mr. T. while a good laugh, is not the greatest antagonist. The story feels all wrong, very LA, very unRocky for the majority of the film. It's a very sequel movie. If that makes sense to you.
Best moment- Mickey's death scene. Aloha Burgess.
Worst moment- training montage. 80's heavy baby.
Quotable- "Eye of the Tiger, Rock"
4: Rocky IV: Great start to this one. Apollo shows us just how unstoppable the Russian is and... hey is that James Brown! So, after a lot of posturing we get to Moscow and we fight the guy who is three times Rocky's size. Not surprisingly, Rocky wins the day and defeats communism by himself. An average, but watchable movie.
Best moment- Training Montage, what an improvement
Worst moment- Rocky's speech about world peace. Please don't pontificate Rock.
Quotable- "If he dies, he dies"
3: Rocky Balboa: It doesn't matter if he's sixty, does it. Apparently a good script can overcome that minor problem of Rocky being nearlly eligible for social security. The movie shows that Stallone can actually act in more than grunts and the fight at the end has a lot of emotion to it. Unlike the previous three movies, you actually care what happens at the end.
Best moment- Rocky takes a final bow to the crowd
Worst moment- Rocky's opponents acting... seems like I've said that before.
Quotable- It ain't about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
2: Rocky II: The rematch. One of the best sequels ever made I'd say. For one thing, it's actually plausible that a champion would be so pissed he couldn't knock out some nobody he'd demand a rematch. "I won, but I didn't beat him." Creed says. There is a very good narrative outside the fight about Rocky, Adrian, their baby and Mickey. Everything fits together well and you are on the edge of your seat when Rocky heads to the arena. The final fight is epic, it feels like you watch an entire boxing match in about twenty minutes. Is the ending over the top... maybe, but you know you loved it.
Best moment- I'm gonna say it. Waiting to see who's going to get off the mat.
Worst moment- For some reason I dislike the opening hospital scene. I don't know why.
Quotable- "Win." "What are we waiting for!"
1: Rocky: Lots of suspense for that, huh. Rocky isn't a great boxing movie or a great sports movie. It's just a great movie. I won't use this space to break down the reasons why this is the probably the best sports movie ever. You should know that already. Needless to say, it's a movie were the protaganist wins even when he doesn't win.
Best moment- Running up the art museum steps the second time
Worst moment-N/A
quotable- "Adrian, Adrian"
Currently Watching: Battlestar Galactica Season 4
Currently Reading: I, Robot
Until next time.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Welcome
Welcome to my... I refuse to use the term. It's a notebook, or a journal or a place for me to complain about why everyone is wrong and I'm write. So if your interested in lofty topics like movie quotes, questionable sports knowledge and basically where I'll be flushing my consciousness. Enjoy.
Also, if you navigated here and don't know who I am. Come join in my reindeer games.
Also, if you navigated here and don't know who I am. Come join in my reindeer games.
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